The witchery of the endless, brilliant blue, prairie sky was
only partial balm for heart sore Kitty Russell’s troubled mind. “Damn
that man!” she exclaimed aloud, and the only one who heard her was her high-spirited
horse Beau, who nickered softly in response to the sound of her voice.
Immediately, she felt guilty and took back her statement, if
only to herself. No, damn his job,
always getting in the way. She loved the
man, too much, she sometimes thought. It
hurt so when he chose his badge over her.
But what else could he do, she asked herself. That badge, and the honor and integrity it symbolized,
were such an integral part of the man and what she loved about him. There sure weren’t very many honorable,
trustworthy men in these parts. The fact
that this one had stolen her heart so utterly and completely meant that she
would have to suffer the bad along with the good, and try and keep her everlasting,
fiery temper in check.
Oh! Why did things
have to be so complicated? And why
couldn’t he just have waited a few days to escort that good-for-nothing Ernie
Spivey to Hays? Would a few days’ delay
have mattered so much?
She just wanted a few days with Matt away from Dodge, where
they didn’t have to hide their relationship.
Virgil Ware was very aware of her feelings for Matt, at least she
thought he was. She never tried to hide
the fact that she loved Matt Dillon when they were visiting her aunt and
uncle’s old ranch, like they did when people were around at home. In Dodge, she could never kiss his cheek or hold
his hand or touch him like she wanted to.
Well, truth be told, those caresses and touches occasionally happened
before she’d realized it, and then she’d draw her hand back and look around to
make sure no one was watching.
She thought they’d managed to be pretty discreet so
far. After all, she and Matt weren’t
married, and he was always so afraid that something would happen to her if
their relationship were common knowledge.
She’d tried to convince him otherwise, in the privacy of her bedroom,
after dark when the tough marshal persona was discarded and his guard was down,
only for her. She’d whispered to him
that they didn’t have to hide, that their love was a good thing.
But he always got that look in his eye, a look of cold,
paralyzing fear that she could feel clear down in her own heart. It was irrational, she told him. Nothing was going to happen to her if people
knew. But he would shake his head and
grasp her face between his big hands and make her swear not to tell. He’d lost everyone he’d ever loved, he’d
say. Everyone. And he didn’t want to lose her. Not for anything. Please,
Kitty, promise me…
And she’d promise, before he got so worked up that he wouldn’t
be able to sleep that night. And she’d sit
in the middle of the bed and hold his head in her lap, threading her fingers
through those thick, dark curls. She’d
tell him nothing was going to happen to her.
She wasn’t going anywhere. She
was staying right with him, and no one would ever be the wiser. They’d keep their secret. And then he’d make love to her, telling her
what a sweet girl she was and how much he loved her. Her tough marshal wasn’t so tough behind
closed doors, and that was another reason she loved him so much her heart ached
sometimes.
And now here she was, after a temper tantrum, riding to
Cimarron without him. To visit Virgil
Ware, a widower. She sighed. Oh, why did she have to lose her temper like
that? She knew better. She just loved him so much and it hurt so
bad when he chose his job over her. And
her mouth sometimes moved faster than her brain, unfortunately. She couldn’t always think clearly when it
came to Matt Dillon.
But there was no way in hell she was turning back now. Nuh-uh.
She wasn’t going to have Matt saying “I told you so.” She was only a few miles away from the ranch
anyway now that she’d finally simmered down.
She’d have a nice visit with Virgil and Isom and even Big Sam, and maybe
Matt would join them once he’d transferred his prisoner to Hays. And then she herself could say, “See, I told
you so,” when nothing bad happened on her solo trip.
She didn’t know why Matt was so jealous of Virgil. Virgil had always been very nice to her, but
nothing more really. She was sure that
he could see her attachment to Matt, and he was a gentleman who would honor
that, she knew. Virgil was
harmless. And he was another lawman, to
boot. She had no need to get mixed up
with another one of those, that was for sure.
Kitty urged Beau down the bank of the Arkansas for a drink
among the shade trees. She dismounted,
removing her hat and veil to sit on a log while the horse rested. A twig snapped behind her and she whirled her
head around in alarm. But before she
could do anything, a hand clamped around her mouth. She gave a muffled cry as her horse reared in
alarm.
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